i dedicated my morning wood to you.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
