Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Randomize
