yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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