my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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