that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize