All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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