i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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