No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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