yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
