Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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