I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize