You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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