Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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