Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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