Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
