we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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