Is it normal to miss your booty call?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
