I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
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What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
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I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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