Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
