i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
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