sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
