So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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