Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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