I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
