Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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