my vag is so smooth its legendary
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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