We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
