Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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