i permit you to call me
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
is this the sara with the beer cane?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
