I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
