If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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