okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
