That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
