I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
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