Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
