Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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