dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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