I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
ok first of all what the fuck
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
