Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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