The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
How naked do you want me to be?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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