but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
