Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
you win again, gameday.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I can't put those talents on a resume
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize
