quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize