There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
