Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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