you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Houston, we have a squirter
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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