It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
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there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
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I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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