If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
