I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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