I bet he comes in French.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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